Let’s call them ‘momisms’ and we all do it as parents. The words come sprouting out of our mouths and there is always a meaning to what we say. So what do we really mean when we blast our kids with ‘momisms’? I’m sure you’ve got a couple of great ones up your sleeve, so let us know your favourite ones; we’d love to hear them.
“Because I said so.”
I really, really for the life of me can’t think of a good enough reason. You’ve floored me!
“If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
Please, please don’t say anything for at least 30 seconds. I’m really hoping!
“Don’t forget to say please and thank you.”
Oh please, please just say these words; I’m not sure what I’m going to do if you don’t. But hey if you do, we’ll both be on a good wicket, you’ll look polite and people will obviously think I’m a great mom!
“I am the parent and you are the kid.”
Yeah, yeah, I know you know who’s who, but really I’m just giving myself a bit of a pep talk out loud. I’m not really talking to you.
“Don’t make me come over there.”
I so don’t want to stop what I’m doing and come over there, so please just do as I ask!
“Stop that this instant!”
All you have to do is just stop and then we can forget this ever happened. We never need to talk about it again, okay?
“Don’t make me turn this car around!”
I’m so not going to do that as if we turn this car around we won’t be able to groceries, but I will buy you a treat at the grocery store if you just stop. Please…
I don’t really know what to say and how to let you down easily, but it actually means a no, I just don’t feel like fighting about it now.
“Let’s play the quiet game.”
I can’t take the noise anymore, my ears are about to explode, let’s just do something quiet.
“One day you’ll thank me.”
Let’s pretend this never happened okay?
I haven’t got a clue what you’re talking about; I’m just pretending I do.
“Wow, that’s great sweetie!”
I still have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about, but you sounded quite excited, so I’ll go along with it.
“Go ask Dad.”
Woo hoo; dad can be the bad guy for a change. Yes, victory!
“The dog loves you the most.”
I will use any tactic I can to get you to feed and walk the dog, oh and the poop too!
“Eat your veggies and you’ll grow up to be big and strong!”
I really don’t want to have to admit to your paediatrician that I can’t get you to eat healthy foods, but I also don’t want to have to lie, so please eat just a couple bites. I’m begging you. You’ll get a treat for this.
I mean you are really okay right? Please just do the normal stuff you do, so I know that you really are okay.
“I would never have gotten away with that when I was your age.”
Quite frankly I can’t even remember a thing about being your age, bit it sounds pretty legit to me.
“I am going to count to three and then you better be in your bed.”
I am so out of energy I can barely walk, I just want you to go to bed so I can follow immediately afterwards. I’m going to count to 3, very, very slowly, even adding some halves in there too. After that, I’ve got nothing left in my armour.
“Goodnight, stay in bed tonight okay.”
Oh please, please, really I mean it, please just stay in bed. I’m so tired I’ll probably pretend you’re in bed if you get up, but really just close your eyes and sleep. I’m only asking this one tiny thing of you.
“I love you.”
I love you more than you will ever know. And I really hope I’m doing okay at this mom thing.